Draft – Will Smith [Oh HELL No!]

By: LD · July 18, 2008


That’s right…the king of blogs and the king of box office finally meet – in draft form!

The rules: Pick a Will Smith movie that’s not The Wild West.

The Order:
SN
E
N8
LD
Y

ROUND ONE:


SN:
Will
smith movies,where to start? I gots to have 1) Bad Boys 2 for over the top awesomeness.

LD: Strong pick. It’s hard to argue that Cuba didn’t have it coming, you know?

E)
2) Men in Black. I don’t care what anyone says, I love this movie. Sci-fi popcorn geek goodness. A blast in the movies, plus kick ass Ray Bans baby.

LD) Ray- Bans are always kickass. This is a definitional thing. If I saw a horse wearing Ray-Bans, I’d be like on of those robots from 1950’s movies who is presented with a logical conundrum. I’d start flipping out and smoke would come pouring out my ears.

E) It’s funny how in thinking of all the will smith movies, the ones that floated up in my head were only the BAD ones.

SN) You even liked the murderous pedophile in rambo for his raybans

LD) Guilty!

LD) Will Smith has been in many fewer movies than you might think.


N8)
Gotta take 3) Independence Day. Intergalactic Will Smith rules all other Will Smiths. Also contains more one-liners than most others. “Welcome to Earth!”

LD) I believe you mean “ERF!” Also, Harry Connick Jr’s best film. I’m going to go with:
4) Enemy of the State – It’s not typical Will Smith fare, it’s awfully suspenseful, and I just plain like it. Honestly, I feel like in some ways, it’s a precursor to the Bourne films.

E) Man, THAT’S the movie I was trying to think of. I knew there was a good solid movie in there that didn’t involve him in some ridiciulously bombastic plot.
SN) John Voight is one evil bastard.

LD) Also, it’s notable for featuring a pre-obnoxiously annoying Jack Black.

ROUND TWO:


LD)
5) Men in Black 2

I’ve seen this movie a million times, because it’s always on HBO. Is it good? No, it is most certainly not. But, it’s a harmless sequel with some fun moments. Basically, if ever there was a movie that got a pass based on concept and charisma, this is it. But, I don’t say that as a slight. It’s still a LOT better than stuff like Hitch.

Next up: Someone picks Hitch!

N8) Hitch was a pretty okay movie… there are worse picks out there.
6) Six Degrees of Separation. It’s perhaps his most challenging role and also arguably his best near-stage-caliber performance. He’s amazing in it.

E) Man this guy really DIDN’T do that many movies. Can I take Fresh Prince of Bel Air?
Fine, I’m taking 7) Bad Boys. Because shit just got real.

SN) Shit didn’t get real until Bad Boys 2.
N8) Fresh Prince is more of a movie than anything with Martin Lawrence….

LD) I’ll not have that talk. Martin Lawrence was brilliant in Big Mama’s House 2.

E)
I enjoyed this title on Will Smith‘s IMDB page: MILF & Cookies (2008) (TV) (in production) (executive producer)
SN) I will not be taking Hitch. Gotta go with 8) Pursuit of Happyness for solid acting, albeit too few explosions.

LD) Homeless shelter operator: I’m sorry, but you can’t come in. No space!
Will Smith: Oh, HELL NAW!
*pulls out dual Desert E’s, starts firin’*

HYPER-ABBREVIATED ROUND 3:
SN) My last pick is 9) I, Robot, which sodomized AI with an inanimate carbon rod.

LD) What the hell else has he even been in? I’ll take 10) Ali. I actually really liked it. Plus, Mann is the bomb.

Aw, Will…Why’d you go and join them?
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